Pity Party

Since this is our children's first year in preschool we seem to be stricken with a never ending length of sickness. I suspect it's due to new exposure to germs, whatever the reason I am ready for this season of sickness to be over.

I hate to see my children sick, as all parents do. The glazed eyes, pink cheeks, and hot-to-the-touch skin, just melt my heart, usually. After this season, I'm drained and struggling to find the patience needed during this next round that has settle upon the house.

During a Monday morning playgroup Noelle mentioned her throat was hurting and I put my hand to her forehead, instantly feeling the warmth and I found my self rolling my eyes, annoyed. We hightailed it out, as I apologized for potentially infecting the surrounding children.

During the drive home I cried. I cried at the thought of more sleepless nights tending to more sickness. I cried thinking of the endless complaining that accompanies my children. I cried dreading the doctor appointment, with four children crammed into a room waiting. I cried thinking of the disinfecting that I will have to do, again. I cried because I needed it, and it felt good.

It was a pity-party drive home. I composed myself and began the nursing aspect of being a Domestic Engineer. Comforting my ill Noelle, keeping her hydrated and giving the right amounts of drugs to keep the fever down. Occupying the other three so they were away and not worried about Noelle, as this always is the trickiest part. I forgot about the amount of work and just surrounded Noelle with love as she spiraled downhill.

It's strep throat that has decided to enter the house. Noelle is on medication and will soon be better. The first night was long, filled with waking chills, needing Mommy's arms to sooth the pain. I hold her as she shivers, her little body fighting once again. I wipe away the tears as she cries out about her ailing throat. I focus on mending her, trying to push my exhaustion out of my head. Again.

I pray this isn't passed around and this is our last bout before summer. I need a break. We need a break. My patience needs time to recover.

Wish me, and us luck. We need it.