Neglect to the Upteenth Degree

Oh how I have neglected this precious blog.  I can't specifically say what has caused this neglect.  Just life has come and gone.  Times have diminished that I have had to actually sit down and write.  This new house, although completely wonderful, has made it difficult to let the children just go play by themselves.  Well, let me rephrase that, Noelle, Max, and Violette are great on their own, obeying the rules of the road and respecting the boundaries of "stop sign to stop sign".  Zane on the other hand has earned a reputation, he pees on signs, runs off to neighbor's houses, and causes general mayhem when I'm not keeping a hawk like eye on him.  Of course, that requires most of my times, as kids love to play outside.  The house work and this blog, then, in turn suffer.  Oh well, they are outside having fun, playing, and burning off energy.  I may have a dirty, unorganized house, but at least my children are not glued to the TV

So let's play catch up with multitudes of phone pictures....

We attended the local Lenawee County Fair.  Zane learned he is TERRIFIED of small roller coasters, but everyone loves the animals.

Lake Columbia, ice cream, and parks have been on our agendas, keeping us busy weekly.

And we FINALLY made it up to Traverse City.  Loving the time spent with Mom, Dad, and Alex.  Enjoying the beauty of Lake Michigan and the fun of Grandpa and Grandma's house.  

One more round of swim lessons had to be attended.

Appointments, bike riding, and more fun.

Summer is almost over :-(  School shopping is mostly complete, bags and piles of clothing are scattered around.  Noelle claims in dramatic fashion that she just can't spend her last week cleaning.  I tend to agree as it's almost noon and most the children are still wearing their pajamas and I'm ignoring the tumble weeds of dog fur.)  Open houses and the meeting of the new teachers happens tomorrow (Tuesday) evening.  I'm ready for them to get back,  but very sad at the same time.  Violette will be attending her Kindergarten year, and that alone makes me melt on the inside.  She is so many wonderful things wrapped up and she will be missed.  

When Tragedy Strikes

I grew up in a small community where everyone knew what everyone was doing.  It was nice to grow up there, the trees and foliage acted as a shield from the Big Cities of Downstate.  Neighbors were far and few between.  As I grew I felt that this was not what I wanted.  I wanted a city life.  A life of condo's and taxis, and midnight strolls on well lit streets.  I wanted the hustle and bustle of a large city to consume me and get lost in the fast life.

Today, and over the fast week I am thankful that I have landed in yet again, another small community.  Tecumseh, MI (although we have an Adrian, MI address the children attend Tecumseh Schools and we are closer to Tecumseh than Adrian) is a quaint town that surpassed all my expectations, especially now.  On Thursday July 3rd an accident occurred on US-23.  It was all over the local news, as it shut down the highway (on the Northbound and Southbound side) and traffic was backed up for hours and hours during a big travel day for tourist headed Up North.  This was big news for the traffic backups alone, then mumbling of two casualties began to be heard on the news.  I silently prayed for the families, sad for their loss, but was feeling a disconnect as I did not know them.

I received a message late Thursday night from a close friend.  One of the casualties was the son of the Thursday School director and teacher we had grown to love over the past two years. I was in shock.  Miss Michelle was one of the most tenderhearted and caring women we've had the privilege of knowing. Her son could be seen at Thursday School helping out frequently.  How was he gone?  I was also informed that Zane's past teacher of the two year old class, Miss Lori's daughter was also involved, but was in critical condition.  Another boy, that I did not know was also killed, but who was a big part of the community.  I was so numb, words could not be found.

Tecumseh has a Facebook page called The Real Housewives of Tecumseh, where over 1,200 women belong to it.  It's a great resource for things like doctors, dentists, repairmen, because as soon as you ask for a recommendation many responses are quickly entered.  You can find out community happenings quickly, but at times the site can get catty and a bit bitchy to be a part of.

The news of the recent accident went up on the site quickly and the outpouring of prayers and support began to pour in.  Then someone started a gofundme.com account to help give a bit of reprise from the financial burden these families would be facing.  A quick goal of $10,000 was set.  The Tecumseh Community, and surrounding areas, began showing their support with donations.  The $10,000 goal was reached in a about 24 hours and continued to more than double over the next few days and continues to grow as more and more caring people give donations.

Direct money donations isn't the only way our community has reached out to help.  The two boys were Tecumseh High School Soccer stars while in high school and tonight there is a candle light vigil at the soccer fields that I plan on attending.  Local youth groups are dedicating their meeting to prayer, there is a benefit at the local YMCA occurring, more prayer vigils on Friday and Saturday, it seems endless the amount of support that is being offered and truly makes me prideful of what this great community, that I call home, is doing.

Here is a great article about the boys

Sadly, drunk driving, by the other driver, was the cause of the accident and can be read about here

Prayers will continue for those affect by this horrific accident.  Awe of my community will also continue as the outpouring of support continues.

God, bring comfort and peace.  Peace in your essence.  Peace in your name.  Bring peace to these families who have lost their precious children in death.  Provide comfort for them in this time of grief.  Surround them with love.  Amen

The Fourth

With the Fourth of July falling on a Friday, Tom decided to take Wednesday and Thursday off to make the Holiday extra long.  At first I was very excited, then immediate doom settled in, we had made a decision not to head up to Traverse City, so around Adrian we stayed.  With Tom home for five days straight and no out of town plans solidified, would we just get on each other's nerves?  Would the children just get bored and start fighting with each other more, and direct their anger onto us?

Despite my negative internal and immediate doominess, the long Holiday weekend turned out to a great one.  One filled with much time together and even a bit of adventure thrown in.  Wednesday and Thursday were filled with appointments, shopping, and even a last minute hair cut due to having extra hands around, I was able to actually do some things by myself!!!  It's amazing how easy a doctor's appointment for one child becomes when you only have to bring that child with you!  Meandering through a store by yourself is actually enjoyable and something to look forward to!

On Friday (July 4th) we slept in a bit and slowly got ready to make a trip into Ann Arbor and stop in at my Aunt Shaun's house to use her pool.  She was going to be out of town and having a pool so close seemed like the perfect way to spend the 4th.  We packed plenty of food and drinks and headed out, but first we had to capture a picture of all the children sporting their appropriate 4th clothing and by our newly painted front door:

Although a bit chilly due to a broken heater, the pool was a huge hit and the children swam basically all day.  In and out they went, and Zane figured out that with a life jacket on he could swim by himself.  His newly found independence and confidence made for a very enthusiastic boy.  

I have to share a little truth about Zane.  Has entered a bit of a potty mouth stage.  While at our neighbor's house on Thursday evening we told the children that it was time to go home and Zane blurted out, "Oh, Shit, I don't want to go home".  These neighbors are new friends and my face turned bright red while I struggled to stifle a laugh.  Now, at my Aunt's house, located on Ford Lake, there are steep steps down to the lake and Tom took the other three to do some fishing while Zane swam for a bit longer.  When he was ready to head down, he looked at the steps and said, "Oh shit, that's a lot of steps".  We are working at correctly this newly found bad habit! 

We even snagged a ride on the next door neighbor's boat, who insisted he take us on a ride so he could get out of fixing his dock.  

We rounded up the scattered mess and left for home to get some dinner.  All four children fell asleep within minutes, tired out by the days adventures.

Saturday we were invited by my Aunt (same one) to her and her husband's Lake Columbia lot.  It's a mere 20 mins from our house, so we couldn't pass up some lakeside fun.  They parked their camper and had lots of family and friends out to enjoy the water.  We went on a long pontoon ride around the suprisingly large lake.  The calming sound of the motor and gentle sway of the waves put Zane out and left drool on Tom!  

We left just before the Fireworks, sadly missing them yet again this year,  but the evidence points to our children not being ready to stay up that late with their early next morning rising and complaints to go home before anything exciting happens.  One year we will make it up late, but they continually show us that they are not ready to handle it just yet.  

Sunday came and we enjoyed a very lazy day.  We played a bit outside, but mostly enjoyed our last day together.  Tom did not annoy me and to be frank, I loved being around him for the full five days.  We laughed, held hands, stuck together on discipline and backed each other up, and genuinely enjoyed our time together alone in the evenings and during the day as a family.  

Vacation was good. 

Summer Has Arrived!

Can they go back yet?  Can they?  Pretty please!  Yeah, it's been a bit of an adjustment around here.  I could sugar coat it and write about how wonderful it has been to have all four children home all day long.  It would be a blatant lie.  A whoppers of all whoppers.  I'm not all about our life being "blog perfect" and this last week has been excruciatingly difficult.

 I have locked myself in my bedroom on countless occasions and cried.  I cried so hard and long, that my eyes remind puffy and red for hours afterwards. Cried so hard my body shook.  Cried so much my nose permanently ran.  I have screamed and yelled, gritted my teeth, reread Love & Logic, screamed some more, talked calmly, ignored long winded tantrums, held doors shut as a five year found super human strength to pry it open, found my blank look and keep my face motionlessness as they screamed at me, broke up a sibling argument, separated physically fighting children, broke up more arguments, gave many serums on tattle-tailing  ignored them some more, put them through more chores, cried even more.  You get the picture. I have gone through an endless gamut of tantrums, bickering between siblings, and my own internal breakdowns.  

Today was not better, although I do see a light (it's far away and barely visible, like a spec of dust light fleeting in the wind of tantrums) and I will continue to kiss them goodnight and say "I love you" upon their much needed 8pm bedtimes.  On a side note, yes Noelle is 8 years old and yes she still has an 8pm bedtime. I would be happy to extend this time if she starts to A) sleep in past 6am B) wasn't yawning at 7pm C) showed me she could act in the matter of a young lady that deserves a later bedtime, as it has to be yearned in our house.  Bedtime, right now, is a magical time.  A time that I can skip gleefully from their rooms and twirl as I quietly wait for the click of the door knob.  It's a time where I can finally laugh at the mayhem of the day, I can remember those times that I was truly enjoying the children (yes, the do still exist and I do, very much, still love them) but I can also recount the many minutes they spent in their rooms, or scrubbing toilets or doing some other mundane chore for punishment.  I can crack open a crisp, cold beer, and relax, finally.

The root of our problem (I speculate) has to do with adjustment.  Noelle and Max have been away for the past nine months during the week.  They have to remember the house rules and how to get along with their younger siblings.  Violette and Zane have had the run of the roost and they are learning again, how to share and play with their older, and bossier counterparts.  It's an adjustment for me as well.  I have to remember how to fairly and kindly discipline them while having fun as well.  I need to remember how Zane is only 3 and can't keep up with Noelle all the time.  Violette gets pushed around a lot but is quick to snap, and Noelle can be a bit devious at times.  Max needs to curb is inner Mom and stop always telling on his siblings while refusing to help out.  As the days go on I am hoping that they get used to being a foursome and begin to simmer down.  In the meantime it's been a battleground and once you step foot in the house you leave feeling drained and out of breath and patience.

Swimming lessons have been a good distraction and all the kids are doing well.  Max is struggling the most, having actually swam better last year.  I suspect a large growth spurt in the last few months have left his limbs longer and more uncoordinated.  He is figuring things out and working hard to keep himself about the water.  Violette has improved the most, being able to swim entirely on her own for longer distances.  Noelle continues to work on proper strokes and learned how to dive without ending in a belly flop.  Zane started off rocky, and is now jumping on his own and fully submerging his head without batting an eyelash.

Zane is a little monster, as I've stated on many occasions, but one that brings many laughs into our house.  He has is own personal style and can be seen with some sort of costume, boots, guns, knives (plastic) being worn at any given time.  These particular pictures were taken while practicing throwing a football with Tom.  It made me smile:

Max was also shirtless and Zane always wants to be like his big brother.

A trip to Sturgis to visit Grandpa Roehrig and give Mom a break was schedule for today (Saturday) but has been postponed due to a severly sprained ankle by Tom.  The sprain had us visitng Urgent Care to get an x ray to rule out a break.  The swelling was a lot and Tom was in a large amount of pain.  The break was going to be my little salvation from the chaos, but that time shall come again.  For now, I'll just concentrate on getting through the days, one by one and continue to pray things get easier!!